Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Unfit Mother

Hello everyone! So, I've been an absent blogger lately, I'll tell you why. I'm almost embarrassed to share why I've been absent. Last week my husband was in NYC for work, yes, you heard right, an entire WEEK. He was going hog wild in NYC with his brother (his brother went with him) while I was here, alone with the kids, and we had the house painted so not only did I need to keep the kids busy during the day, I had to keep them away from the wet paint and all of our furnishings that were clumped together in the middle of the room. 
Tuesday, August 10.
He was gone for 2 days when I called 911. Have you ever had to call 911 (everything is fine)??? It's the scariest thing I've ever done and it was just like the movies. I called b/c the baby had a blanket over his head in the crib and was gasping for air. I panicked and completely lost it, screaming, crying and sure he was not okay, turns out he never really stopped breathing (thank goodness). I left him in the crib for a moment to feed the other two breakfast and he was crying the entire time. Suddenly he let out a shriek and then stopped crying. I found him with the blanket over his face and he was drooling, hands and feet were kicking like crazy (which is a good thing, in hindsight), I grabbed him and he seemed lethargic which is when I called 911. I was on the phone with 911, and screaming at my 4 year old to run to the neighbor's house. Of course, he didn't go over there he just kept asking "why mommy?", "why mommy?", I was crying on the phone while the operator was telling me "calm down ma'am, I can't understand you, is the baby breathing"...(he was breathing the entire time and I had no idea), I was freaked out by this question and decided to take the 4 year old and run next door. I shoved the middle child out of the way, slammed the door and ran with the baby next door, dressed in my nightgown, barefoot and no bra (I'm nursing so no bra is not a pretty sight). I'm still on the phone with 911, my neighbor comes out and I ask (wail is more like it) her if the baby is breathing and she says as calmly as if I've asked her what the weather is like, "if you mean smiling and breathing, yes". I tell her that Clara is next door alone so we run back to my house and Clara is dressed in Vincent's hat and clothes and eating his bagel. We hear the sirens and I tell my neighbor that it's heading here, Vincent is crying because Clara is eating his bagel, thankfully neither kid seems to be affected by my shrieking and continue to carry on as if it's another Tuesday. Paramedics arrive and are so kind and relieved that the baby is fine. I'm sure he never actually stopped breathing, I just overreacted to seeing him like that. I now know how I act in a crisis and it's not pretty. 
The paramedics ask what happened and then ask if I have 3 boys and for some reason this makes me laugh and  I then have to explain that Clara is a girl, she just likes to wear her brothers clothes and shoes.  I can laugh about this now and I'm grateful everything is okay.

Thursday, August 12.
I'm putting Clara's jammies on her and Sam (the baby) is screaming in his swing, and I hear my oldest "I can't take the crying" and then muffled cries from Sam and then loud screaming from him again and then "I can't the crying" again muffled cries from the baby so I run out and see my oldest holding a pillow over the baby's face. I panic and scream at him and remind him of why I called 911 just 2 days ago.  

My only job now is to make sure the baby makes it to his first birthday in 8 months. It's going to be a loooong 8 months. Is summer over yet????

Tomorrow, I'll post pictures of my must have stationery for girls...cute, cute, cute!